Poor Elijah was a Superman fan. He devoured D.C. Comics and raced full tilt through the neighborhood with his arms out in front of him and a makeshift cape flapping from his neck. He also had a ...

Poor Elijah is a traditionalist. It took him years to accept miniature lightbulbs on his Christmas tree, and the cash he drops in the Salvation Army kettle is as much charity as it is guilty penance ...

Before he landed in the classroom, Poor Elijah was a handyman at a ski resort. A skier with a cast on his arm struck up a conversation. “It must be great living where you can ski every day,” effused ...

Little Poor Elijah invented an imaginary friend named Hand. Mostly Hand was invisible, but on less mystic occasions he bore a striking resemblance to the miniature fingers and thumb residing at the ...

Poor Elijah's Emperor Awards commemorate the monarch who paraded in his underwear while his subjects applauded his good taste. In that spirit, here are some of the past year's proudest press release ...